Favorite Baby Items

I'm so glad this was something people wanted to read about, because researching items and looking at options are some of my favorite things to do #weirdo. When I was pregnant, I was constantly looking at (mostly twin) Mom's instagrams and blogs to figure out what baby items would be best for our family, while making sure to keep a good budget. We were SO blessed with hand me downs and gift cards that we were able to splurge on a few items that I didn't know we would be able to get. I love our people! If you are a Mama to be, Papa to be, buying a gift for a baby shower, or setting up your registry- here are some of my favorite items that we've used for our babies.
*I am sure you know that these are all my OPINIONS and I'm not getting paid to write this post. This actually makes me laugh, but I just had to say it! Things that are for twins, I will put an * by the name, so if you are specifically looking for twin things, you can just go right to it.

First and foremost, swaddles. We love love love these swaddles. We swaddled our babies from day 1 in the hospital and we still swaddle them now. Krew is starting to wiggle his way out of them, no matter how much of a professional swaddler his Dad is, but they have been one of our favorite items all along. Not to mention they have the cutest colors, are so incredibly soft, and stretch to the max. We learned very quickly we preferred to swaddle our babies with stretchy material rather than muslin, and we just use the muslin as blankets, cover ups...etc.

Another favorite item are their beds. This was one of the items that we got to splurge on because of our gift cards! Reminder, we need to buy 2 of most things, so it adds up! If you're buying just 1, it seems much more affordable. They love these. I read a ton of articles comparing the snuggleme to dockatot, and I just really liked how it hugs the babies when you lay them in it, like you are still holding them. We haven't used the dockatot, so I have no idea how we would've liked it, but plenty of our friends use it and they love it. This is just the one I decided on, and I am so glad we did!

We use these covers for their car seats, and for me when I'm nursing in public. I've worn this while walking around nursing Krew in Costco! They are also super functional and handy when the babies are sleeping and you're out and about, so people don't wake up your babies :) People looooove new babies. But I can't blame them, I do too!

We got their crib sheets from Spearmintlove. They are so soft, and have tons of cute color and design options. Since babies are still sleeping next to us right now, I've loved using their crib for their monthly pictures and seeing the cute crib sheet in the background.

Our sweet, sweet friends gifted us one of the most convenient gifts we'll ever receive. If you plan on using formula, or have to supplement like we do, the Baby Brezza will save your life. This kuerig for baby formula shoots out WARM formula in however many ounces you want, in 5 seconds flat. That's 5 seconds compared to 5 minutes of mixing, warming, and your baby crying. We were so blessed by this gift, because it was one of those items out of our budget, but now we use it every single day.

Let me just say, GET THE SLEEPERS WITH THE ZIPPERS. Yes, that one you're about to buy is so dang cute and it has little dinosaurs or unicorns on it, but it has buttons. Put it back. Find an equally cute one with zippers. Buy that one.

The other way we swaddle our babies are sleep sacks. They are awesome and a much quicker way to get them in and out during their middle of the night feedings and diaper changes. We love the Halo Sleep Sack for Ry and the Love to Dream for Krew since he can have his hands more free. Our friends swear by the Nested Bean sleep sacks, and I will update this post when I have tried it for myself, but the reviews are amazing on it!

We landed on Dr. Browns bottles and most of their products. I feel like this is definitely a personal choice, and whatever your baby likes best. We got lucky and the ones I registered for are the ones the babes liked. 

Diapers are a huge topic. We were so blessed in the diaper department because we have yet to have to buy a package of diapers, and with twins that's A LOT of diapers. Babies are out of the newborn size and onto size 1, and we were given a few different types of brands as gifts. My favorite is Hello Bello. Second favorite are the Pampers Swaddlers. Those are just my personal favorites because of the softness, poop hold, and easy assembly.

*Twin Item
Here are two options for twin pillows, both used for feeding. One you can both feed and set them in it like a Boppy pillow. I am so glad we were gifted both because I prefer the Twin Z pillow for setting them in it and letting them hang out, or if we need to bottle feed them at the same time, they are right next to each other. If I am tandem nursing, I prefer the My Breast Friend pillow as the babies have more room for wiggles. I will say the Twin Z has amazing back support while nursing them!

*Twin or not twin item
When doing my research for must-haves for twins, this Halo Bassinet was one of the top things on the list. We were so lucky that our resale store in town has a waiting list, and someone who had twins was getting rid of a lot of their furniture. I had them put me on the list for this specific item, and a week later they called me that it was in-store! I was so excited. This has been a life saver for us for sleeping. It sits right by our bed and we can get them both in and out easily. They also have a single, so if you're just having 1 baby, I would also recommend!

*Twin Item
I did a TON of research on strollers. Heck, I still am. Choosing a double stroller is tough. I'm super glad I listened to a lot of twin mamas that said to surpass the expensive double stroller for the first bit, and get a stroller frame that you can just pop the car seats straight into. I can't tell you how easy it is, and the babies love it. We get lots of comments about our choo-choo train when we're out and about, but it's super easy to maneuver and steer once you get used to it. It definitely takes up tons of trunk space, but that's to be expected with double anything.

Speaking of car seats, the ones we decided on were the Maxi Cosi Mico 30. These are the infant car seats, and I chose them because they were super light (toting 2 as they gain weight gets heavy!), the reviews were great on them, and not to mention they are super cute. Would definitely recommend them. As they move into their next size of car seat, I could definitely see us sticking with this brand.

I hope this was helpful for some of you! If you have a tried and true baby item that you swear by, let me know and I will add it to the list!

-Cassie

My birth story.

Saturday, September 28th is the day our lives were changed forever. The day that seemed would never come, finally did. It was time for Krew and Rylee to enter the world.
I didn't sleep a wink the night before, plus I needed to get up to pee 39 times. I can't explain to you the emotions that were going through my head as the hours and minutes were getting closer to us to meet our son and daughter for the first time. Being induced is the weirdest thing. You see, I am a planner. I like to have a plan for everything, and know what is going to come next. So, naturally, you would think I would love the idea of being induced. And I was, in the beginning. I loved the idea to be able to have the room setup the way I wanted, to have my diffuser of calming oils going, worship music playing, and knowing exactly the plan of action that was about to take place. But as the days came and went, and the babies weren't here yet, and the more pain I was in, I no longer liked the idea of having to wait. I wanted them out as soon as possible. In a good way :) I now wanted to go into labor naturally (I secretly wanted my water to break somewhere cool like Target, knowing full well how mortified I would be) and didn't care about the "plan" I had in my head.
But, my induction date was here. They did not want to come out any earlier than September 28th. We checked into the hospital at 6 am and by 7 am I was in my hospital gown with my IV in, and petocin started to flow. My doctor came in (stinkin' love her), checked me, I was at a 3 already, and told me she would be back at 11 am to break my water. Krew had been super low for a couple weeks now, and my doctor thought that because he was basically on his way out already, once she broke my water, things would move very quickly. Now let me tell you, because Krew was so low and was putting so much pressure on my cervix, it hurt. A LOT. Once she left, I couldn't believe how fast time seemed to go. 11 am came and she walked in and asked about the epidural. I had read a lot of articles (go figure) about twin births, and also from talking with my doctor, and knowing full well having twins is a completely different scenario, I knew I wanted an epidural once the pain became too much. They usually encourage it because a lot of twin births will end with a c-section and I would already be hooked up making things a bit easier and able to move more quickly in the OR. All twins births must happen in the OR because of this. Because twins are always considered "high risk", even if you have a healthy pregnancy as we did, you will always deliver them in the OR in case something goes wrong and they need to do an emergency c-section. I didn't like this, but I knew I had no say. I told my doctor I would wait until after she broke my water for the epidural. It was the weirdest feeling in the world when she broke my water. Legit felt like I could fill up a kids pool with the amount of fluid that came out! And it kept coming. I kept apologizing to the nurses and telling them, "oh my gosh it keeps coming out!". They assured me it was very normal, and it was part of their job to take care of that stuff. God bless labor and delivery nurses. Ok all nurses. My doctor asked me when I would like to have the anesthesiologist come in, and I kept saying, "I don't know, you tell me!". She said how about an hour, and I agreed. Once he came in (on his birthday!), everyone else except Justin had to clear the room. At this point the whole clan was there, and they headed to the waiting room.
We got all setup for the epidural and he talked me through the whole process. He told me I had to be very still, and to round my back so he can fit the needle in the right spot. It definitely didn't feel pleasant, but was over pretty quickly. I started to feel my legs and butt go numb, so we thought everything was working. About 15 minutes later, I started to feel increasing pain in my contractions. I asked my nurse if this was normal and she said it could take about 15-20 minutes for it to completely kick in. I started to watch the monitor and keep a close eye on my contractions, and I told Justin that the pain was getting worse, not better. They tried a few other things to see if it would help, but an hour and a half of labor pains later, they called him back in to do another epidural, and we went through the whole process all over again. This time it worked.
The day went on, and still no babies. The nurses and my doctor checked me a few more times, but by 6:00 pm I was still only to a 7 1/2. My doctor told me they would like to insert a wand thing that  would be able to detect how intense the contractions were, since mine were frequent enough that it didn't make sense as to why I hadn't fully dilated yet. Once they were able to monitor my contractions, she was able to come to the conclusion that the intensity of my contractions were not very strong anymore. About 7:00 she came in the room and began to talk to us about our next steps. She explained that my uterus had been working too hard for too long and that was the reason my contractions were not as intense as they should be. She said that our situation was not an emergency situation and we could take our time deciding on what to do next. I asked her honest thoughts and she said in her opinion, I could probably get to a 10 with time, but the intensity of my contractions wouldn't allow me to push, and I would end up going through all of that for nothing and end up with a c-section. So basically my options were to have a c-section now, or to wait and get to a 10, try to push, most likely not be able to, and have a c-section. As soon as she left the room, the weight of it all just hit me. I felt in that moment, my body gave up. I could actually feel my body be discouraged. Here I carried these babies for 38 weeks, had a perfectly healthy pregnancy, they were both head down, Krew was so low they could feel his head and he was ready to come out- I couldn't believe this was going to end with a c-section. Justin and I were left in the room alone and we shared some words, hugs, tears, and decided that it would be no use to put my body through anymore that it already had, and we told my doctor we would go ahead with the c-section.
As soon as those words came out of my mouth, everything was a blur. It was about 7:30 by now and the nurse came in and they started to prep me for surgery, and she assured me she would be with me the whole time. Not going to lie, I was very nervous about this whole process, but my Mom and Mother in-law prayed over me before I went back for surgery, and that did give me some peace. Within minutes I was brought into the OR and right away I started to feel nauseous. I told the nurse I needed the puke bag and I immediately started puking. The anesthesiologist (I felt) was trying to rush me onto the table, and I kept telling him that I needed to puke, so they literally moved me as I was puking. From this part onward, I've had to have many people explain what happened to me, because with all the pain meds, my recollection is very hazy.
I remember telling Justin that I could feel them cutting me open. He immediately told the nurse and the anesthesiologist asked me if I could feel pain, or I could feel pressure. I swore I could feel the side of my incision, like it didn't get numbed all the way, and he told me, "don't worry you will see your babies in 5 minutes", as to try to get my mind off of it. I really had no choice. Everything happened so fast, and before we knew it, we heard Krew's little cry and they had Justin bring him over to me. Because I had so much pain medication in me, I could barely open my eyes to see him. I was drifting in and out of sleep, trying desperately to see my son for the first time. They took him from Justin and then it was Rylee's turn to come out. She took a little bit longer to cry, but she finally did, and all was right in the world. My two babies were on the outside now. Justin brought them both over to me, and I forcefully kept my eyes open just long enough to get a few good looks in before I couldn't keep them open any longer. They were the most beautiful things I had ever seen. Both born at 8:20 pm on September 28th. Krew is technically 15 seconds older than his "little" sister :)
Now, my story is not over once the babies were born. Because my uterus had been so overworked for so long, once the babies came out, it "flopped". The uterus normally continues to contract and expels the placenta. After my 2nd placenta was delivered, because my uterus was no longer contracting, which is called uterine atony, it caused me to hemorrhage. I didn't need a transfusion, so that was good, but it was definitely scary to learn about all of this hours after. While this was happening, Justin had to take our babies and go to the recovery room by himself. I remember being woken up on the table to incredible pain as my doctor was pushing on my stomach trying to push all the blood out so it didn't clot. I couldn't move, but the pain was unbearable. Soon, all of it was over, and I found myself back in the recovery room with 2 babies latched on to me and nursing. I was still so out of it, and still very nauseous. I continued to throw up as the medicine weaned itself out of my system. They didn't allow anyone to come back and see us until it had been 2 hours or so, and then they could come back 2 by 2.
The babies were as healthy as could be, they needed no time in the NICU, they were a healthy weight, and we were so incredibly in love with them. We were able to go home the following Tuesday, but I was still in a lot of pain and unable to move very well at all. Once we got home, we got into our new routine pretty quickly and our lives were never going to be the same ever again.
We love you so much Krew and Ry Girl.

Infertility. Part 2.

I actually didn't know if I was going to write a part 2, but I knew after I reread my very scatterbrained, written from my phone, part 1, I had so much more to say. In the most humble way possible, my last post was viewed over 1,000 times. That is actually incredible considering my most-viewed post was called, ironically,  "It's a Boy! (not mine)" that I posted when we found out my best friend was pregnant with her firstborn, and it had around 400 views. This just goes to show that I am not alone in this fight. 

 I was scrolling through my Instagram this morning when a picture came up that caught my eye. It is actually the picture I reused for this blog.  I follow SheReadsTruth, and I try to do a few of their devotionals every now and again. I highly recommend the app to all females. Anyway, I will highlight the verse again that goes with the picture, "Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill what He has spoken to her." I immediately started bawling. You see, throughout this whole process, I have stated over and over again about God's timing. I know with my whole heart that God will make me a mother in His time. And without being too obvious, that hasn't happened yet. This has actually tested my faith so much more than I would have thought. I wrestle back and forth with the fact that the God of the universe, who put the world in motion, who has healed the blind, made the lame walk, the dumb speak, brought Lazarus back from the dead has not fulfilled His promise to me. Yet.

I believe with my whole heart His promise. But, that has actually been the hardest part for me. I know that God performs miracles. I believe whole-heartily in the power of prayer. I know we have prayer warriors all around us, lifting us up. And every month, I believe and have faith that God will perform a miracle. And when He doesn't, it literally crushes me. I do not understand. I actually get mad at God. Then the guilt sets in about being mad at God, because deep down I really do trust is His timing. Infertility is tough, folks. 

I came across an Anniversary card I gave Jus this last July. It was tandem bike with some comment about it being perfect for two. I opened the card, and I had written something along the lines of praying this would be our last anniversary as a family of 2. Sometimes, I am not sure why I put myself through this torture, but I'm sure it's the same reason why I keep a box of negative pregnancy tests. (can you say crazy town) But I guess when you want something so badly, you go a little crazy.

I am so, SO ready to kick 2017 to the curb. It can seriously go bye-bye. There were some really wonderful things that happened this year, and I will I'm sure post about that at a later time. I am still grateful for the life Jus and I have created for ourselves, but I know none of what he have, or have done would be possible but by the grace of God. 

Thank you all for your support, love, prayers, and hugs during this time. I can't tell you how much I appreciate your awareness, privacy, yet love we feel. We truly have the best friends and family in the world.

Merry Christmas. 

Infertility. Part 1.

Infertility: Not getting pregnant despite having carefully timed, unprotected sex for one year.

(Yes, I said the S word)

I can’t begin to explain to you how hard it is for me type that word. Infertility. I never thought that a healthy 28 and 30 year old, would be having conversations with our doctors about next steps we need to be taking to grow our family. But here we are.

After making my Mother’s Day post this past May, I got such an outpouring from women who were going through similar struggles, or went through similar struggles as infertility brings. Women who maybe have never shared their stories before, shared them with me, and I cherish the vulnerability that we shared together in telling pieces of our stories. Maybe this post will allow others to feel as not alone as the last one did.

This year and a half has been the most emotionally draining, never-ending rollercoaster I have ever been on. Some days you have hope, faith, and happiness. And then comes the guilt, the doubt, and the anger. Being constantly let down. You don’t understand why. You don’t understand why other people have no problem (in your mind) having kids, and you’re having such a hard time.

I’ve really struggled with true joy in my life during this time. The numbness you feel never seems to go away. One minute you’re laughing, and then the sadness comes out of nowhere. The corners of your smile disappear, and the thoughts in your head, you’d never share with anyone. You’re not quite sure who you are anymore because you’ve made all these plans for a baby that hasn’t come yet. You try to make “future” plans to go places, attend weddings, girl trips...etc, but deep down you hope and pray you can’t go because you have a brand new baby. How do you plan for the future, when you have no idea what the future looks like?

I never thought God’s timing would take so long, but I also know the work that He has been doing in our lives during this time. Jus and I can’t wait to be parents. However long, or how it might be, we know that God is preparing our hearts for the someday we get to hold a sweet little one with the last name Ahrens.